Archive for December, 2005

Happy New Year cards

C and I are staying in tonight, no New Year celebrations for us. I’m also staying well away from the tv so I can avoid Natasha bloody Kaplinsky and Jools ruddy Holland. New Year celebrations just don’t excite me. I’m not a big drinker, so I stay in and save lots of money. The celebration of one second changing to another seems very silly to me.

as seen on adult dvd popcorn

Interracial Hole Stretchers
Chew On My Spew 3
Pussy Party 13: Squirt, Squirter, Squirting
I Can’t Believe I Took The Whole Thing
Big Sausage Pizza
My Daughter’s Fucking Blackzilla

The best product I have ever found to zap spots is Skin Doctors Zit Zapper (£9.95) It actually does work overnight, though if you have a spot the size of Mount Versuvius it might take longer. The blurb says:

Clinical formula works in 4 ways to eliminate spots overnight

•Deeply exfoliates and unclogs skin pores,
•Remove oil and cleanse spots in as little as 8 hours
•Cleanses out the affected area.
•Calms the appearance of ugly red swelling.

I had a lovely Christmas, and apart from my grandad’s homophobic tirade, everything went well. I got a cool new camera phone (an bit improvement on my old heavy black and white mobile) and a miss a kit (pink swiss army knife) from C and lots of lovely money from the rest of the family. Of course Christmas isn’t supposed to be about what presents you received (nor all the food I scoffed) and it was nice to spend time with the family (even if they repeat themselves and rant on about men kissing). 3 out of 6 family members had mobility problems so the living room looked like physiotherapy centre with wheelchairs, walking sticks and other apparatus.

A C Original Christmas Card

Check out pictures of chavvy houses with too many Christmas lights on at house blinger. Turn your speakers on and click bling-rock for a musical extravaganza.

My dad arrived home today!! Fresh from his third and hopefully final operation on Wednesday to fix the torn ligaments in his shoulder. He’s unable to use his right arm or put any weight on his legs so he can’t wheel himself about in the wheelchair. It’s so good to see him home, although it will be a long time before he can walk and drive again.

C and I spent a lovely weekend at his parents for an early Christmas celebration because C’s parents are off to Antartica for the holiday period. C’s mum cooked up a lovely nut roast as all six of us (not including the meat eating dog) are vegetarians. I helped to decorate the tree and there were even some presents underneath for me. We both got stockings to take home. I may be 27 but I still love unwrapping stocking presents.

The cost of pixelating-out the Crazy Frog’s animated penis from the last video – £3,500.

Jesus with clown – possibly the scariest drawing in the world

My dad is recovering from an operation which he had on Sunday. The doctors inserted metal plates into his fractured pelvis. We visited him after the operation and he looked very poorly and he was in great pain. He seemed a little better today, the pain is being managed with morphine.

The next step to recovery is to get my father up into a wheelchair which is no mean feat when you can’t use your legs or one arm. He may be home for Christmas but it all depends if he can get a bit more mobility back. We need to start making our home wheelchair accessible and turning the living room into a bedroom.

Neither my mother nor I drive so getting to the hospitals (Airedale and now St. James) has been a bit of a pain. We are using buses but you have to make a couple of changes and it takes an hour plus to get there. So if we are going visiting we don’t usually get home till about 10pm.